Monday, July 30, 2012

Killer English

Principal to student..." I saw u yesterday rotating near girls' hostel pulling cigarette...? "
( a table top???....hav heard about pulling legs, this is sumthing new)

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Tomorrow call your parents especially mother and father
(Any other options???)
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Class teacher once said :

"Pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!"
(Who??? paper or student???)

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Once Hindi teacher said...."I'm going out of the world to America..."

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Don't laugh at the back benches...otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down.....
(Grrr....this person needs Basic Communication Skills Class Room Training)

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It was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered. She tried to switch the fan on, but there was some problem. And then she said

"why is fan not oning" (ing form of on)
(New Discovery)

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Teacher in a furious mood...

Write down your name and father of your name!!
(Excuse me...)

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"Shhh... quiet... the principal is revolving around college"
( he a satellite or sumthing???)

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My manager started like this

"Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids"
(Child marriages are banned... :D)

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"I'll illustrate what I have in my mind" said the professor and erased the board
(What an illustration...I like this professor)

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"Will you hang that calendar or else I'll HANG MYSELF"
(Well, you can proceed, would u like to leave a note behind as well...)

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(That will be better....)

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Chemistry HOD comes and tells us...

"My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter"
(No Comments...chemical locha!!!)

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"Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when I am in the class?!"
(Because we want to check similarities :-) )

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Lab assistant said this when my friend wrote wrong code...

"I understand. You understand. Computer how understand??
(In terms of 1's n 0's)

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Seeing the principal passing by, the teacher told the noisy class,
"Keep quiet, the principal has passed away"
(2 minz of silence)
The PT master told the students who were notorious.
"Hey, from tomorrow onwards you both come together separately"
(Make it possible and I will reward my life time savings...)

PT master to his students "Do you know? I have 2 daughters. Both are girls!!!"
(You need some counselling dude...)

master to his students by pointing his scooter that is parked under a tree,
"See there.My scooter is understanding the tree!!!"
(Wow...when do the non living things started having affairs???)
PT master rocks again,
"Okay guys, all of you stand in a straight circle!"
(Wow what an oxymoron...)

Tuesday, July 03, 2012

Tips for Photographing Fireworks

This is a nice article, written by Trey Ratcliff

Taking photographs of fireworks is great fun -- and very challenging. Veteran photographers know these tricks, and I wanted to share some with you.

Now, you can take photos as well as the stereotypical creepy-uncle-photographer.

1) Get your camera on a stable surface.

2) Turn off your flash.

3) Get something else in the photo besides the exploding firework to give perspective and set the scene.

4) Set your focus once on a distant light, then switch to manual focus for the rest of the fireworks show.

More advanced tricks, for people with fancier cameras:

5) Do you have auto-bracketing? Set it up so that your exposures are 1, 2, and 4 seconds apart. That would be -1, 0, and +1 with the anchor at 2 seconds. Since you never know how many fireworks will explode at once, this adds a random timing element to combat the random timing of the burst pattern.

6) (intermediate tip) Set yourself up in Aperture priority and set the aperture to as low a number as possible. If you don't feel comfy enough in Manual, then Aperture priority mode will figure out your Shutter speed.

7) Turn off auto NR (Noise-Reduction). If it is on, the computer in your camera will take an extra long time to get rid of the noise after each shot… and you'll miss valuable bursts!

8) Keep your finger on the power-off button! If you are in the middle of a long exposure, and you have just seen a pleasing pattern of fireworks with your human eyes, TURN OFF the camera. This will close the shutter and complete the photo, saving you from possibly covering up the nice firework with a new burst.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Shankar One Line Story

Shankar always starts his story from a question.

  1. What happens, if poor people dont get education
  2. What happens, if a public person fell in love with a Governor's daughter
  3. What happens, if a man started killing the corrupted people
  4. What happens, if a twins loves the same girl
  5. What happens, if you become a cheif minister for a day
  6. What happens, if the BOYS ran away from their house for their Ambitions
  7. What happens, if a person get affected by Multiple Person disorder
  8. What happens, if a NRI wants to serve public in India
  9. What happens, If a robot gets emotions

10. What happens, if ___________

Sunday, March 04, 2012

Marketing explained

A Professor explained Marketing to his students

1. You see gorgeous girl in party, you go to her and say I am rich marry me That's Direct Marketing.

2. You attend party  and  your friend goes to a girl and pointing at you tells her. He' is very rich, marry him - That's Advertising. 

3. Girl walks to you and says u are rich, ca...n u marry me? "That's Brand Recognition" 

4. You say I m very rich marry me and she slaps u "That's Customer Feedback" 

5. You say I m very rich marry me and she introduces you to her husband "That's Demand and Supply Gap" 

6. Before you say I m rich, marry me, your wife arrives That's Restriction from Entering New Market. 

Thursday, February 23, 2012


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